everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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