Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
