i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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