Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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