I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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