I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Why are your pants in the freezer?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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