that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
