living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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