Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
