Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
