using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
