her vagine was all disorganized.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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