Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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