i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
