so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
