idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
