So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
