My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
