Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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