how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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