just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Randomize
