ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
