I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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