whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
