brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
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