I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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