Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
