The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
