hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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