Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
