found the other keg... it's in the tree
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
