i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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