threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
