it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
