69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
