his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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