I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize