Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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