WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
We just shotgunned beers for America
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
