it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
