I faked an abortion last night.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
So vagazzling was a success
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
