I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
