I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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