Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
