Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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