will power is for people who don't want to get laid
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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