i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
