...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
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