You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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