we're blogging at a bar
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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